Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Smug Is In This Season

Facebook is a marvelous tool, a fabulouso way to catch up with those from your past & keep up with those in your present. I've befriended several people that I had completely lost touch with ~ former classmates, fellow exchange trippers, & cousins I hardly ever see ~ & it's been wonderful. {Not so wonderful? That guy I dated when I was 15 tracked me down & I accidentally be-friended him while being a happy-clacky clicker one day. I de-friended him a week later. Not sure if he noticed. Don't really care.}

I spend a lot of time on Facebook, especially lately, cuz it seems like other people are spending a lot of time on Facebook & I like a good chat. A good internet chat. I, like most people my age or younger, am becoming more dependent on technology to communicate with others. I'd much rather text or email than talk on the phone with most people. It just seems to cut through all the bullshit. No need to spend 20 minutes making small talk, asking how they are, how their partner is, how their kids are, how does their garden grow when all you want is a simple answer, for the love of God just tell me at what temperature you cook a roast! Sweet Jeebus, how I wish Conrad had email!

But, I digress.

So, while I'm loitering around on Facebook, playing Scrabble & chatting with friends from around the world, I snoop at pictures. I like snooping ~ where they going? What they doing? Who they with? What do they look like?

Heh. What do they look like? The MOST important question of them all. How well are they aging? Are they aging better {i.e. more slowly} than I? Are they fatter or thinner than they were? Do they have more or less wrinkles than I? Do they look older than me?

I'm noticing that quite a lot of people my age are looking older than me. At least, I think they are. Mayhaps I'm suffering from a delusion brought on by the headache bump & a morphine OD, but seriously? I don't think I look my age. People have told me that I don't look my age. When I tell new people my age, they are skeptical.

I don't act my age either. Does that make me look younger or older? That may be a question for therapy.

Anyhoo, I was snooping around in a fellow Class of '89er's photos & I was feeling quite good about myself ~ 6 inch abdominal scar & headache bump notwithstanding. Sure, she's probably a good 30 lbs lighter than she was in high school, but she looks kinda old. & kinda tired. & haggard. & her face is too big for her neck. She's got the whole lollipop thing happening, & that's just not that pretty.

There's another girl that I knew back in the day that is wrinkled & sun-spotted who looks at least 10 years older but we're the same age. She also looks kinda tired. & kinda old. So far {good for her!} managing to avoid the lollipop guild. Well done, fellow traveller!

So, I have to ask myself, what's up with that? Why are these women {I guess at our age we're women, not girls. Stoopid politically correct language! I hate you!} looking aged whilst I seem to be lagging behind? My new passport photo is EXACTLY the same as my old one from 6 years ago. Why has my aging process been slowed? What's up with that?




Then, it hit me. I DON'T HAVE ANY KIDS!



Sweet Jeebus. I have found the secret of the fountain of youth. Turns out...it doesn't contain any youth.





3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am so glad your back to writing things I like reading your bizarre stories and you always make me giggle. give the days of grace a rest they bore me

carrie said...

Yes. Lemme clarify: yes to what you said, not what anonymous said about being bored. Unless anonymous is funding you somehow, then, well, you better do what it says.

I have noticed the aging thing too. My friends with kids THINK they look young..... they don't. They look very tired.
Smokers also tend to look like crap.
And genetics -- I think genetics help. My parents still look pretty young, and it's not for lack of stress of in their lives, I think they both scored some good aging genes, which my sister and I are taking full advantage of.

Anonymous said...

It's so good to have you back. I've missed your posts of all kinds. Even better, that you are feeling well enough to share your observations, your epiphanies, your discoveries, your rants, and, most particularly, your graces. Surely, your graces are feeling particularly clear to you in these days of healing and relief and they help me remember to look for my own. Good to have you back. Good to hear you feeling stronger through the words of your posts. If you want to pay attention to a mere anonymous nosy parker, choose this one. Keep getting better.